For some reason while listening to Sean Moncrieff's show yesterday on Newstalk106 I was overcome by the urge to write Limericks about the items he was covering and sending them in. Heres is what I sent, and they were all read out.
(1) Henry McKean
The day before they sent their reporter Henry McKean to Bull island to make a mockery of the new 5km/hr speed limit on the bridge there by travelling at 6km/hr on his moped.
There was a young man called McKean
Who travelled at speeds most obscene
On his souped up push bike
Whilst holding a mic
Please contact the gards if he's seen!
(2) Sperm bank
Curiously a listener texted in and asked Sean if he knew any good sperm banks!
A man chose to find a sperm bank
And hoped hed have Sean to thank
Said Moncrieff "I'm aware
Of one in Adare"
But thats a long way to go for a ....donation!!!!
(3) Peace Process Row
RTE's current affairs show Questions and Answers had a barney this week between Minister for Justice Michael MacDowell and Sinn Fein negotiator Mitchell Mcloughlin.
McDowell went on Q & A
So the public could all hear him say
To yer man from Sinn Fein
"Your criminally insane!
And I can't wait to lock you away!"
(4) Closing Time
The Dail (Irish parliament) is considering a move to 24-hour pub opening.
There was a TD who proposed
That pubs should no longer be closed
The debate it was fast
For the Dail at last
Had a motion which noone opposed!
I was eager to end my lyrical diarrohea so I finished with this
A man was struck down with a curse
Everything had to end up in verse
So he did one last poem
And left to go home
Before things could get any worse!